Episode 188 is LIVE! It’s an on air coaching with a mindful mom of two school aged girls, 8 and 6.5 years old.
The first challenge we untangle is silliness. Things like playing at the table, being excessively loud, and tickling each other during times of needing to stay on task, such as bedtime. Anna Seewald deciphers playful energy versus stress energy. Is she angry, upset or feeling judged? The nervous system is sending her into a high energy state as a defense mechanism. Can you tune into this dysregulation …. is it a sensory trigger, diet, body movement changes (like clumsiness) or change in voice.
So what to do? Anna shares some tips for silliness:
- Refrain from pointing out the behavior
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Tune in to recognize the type of silliness, is it genuine playfulness, but you as the parent is feeling touched out or annoyed? If it’s you feeling overwhelmed can you recognize that and remove yourself from the situation?
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If this is “red zone” silliness, like drunken, exaggerated behavior. Does this behavior pop up during a certain time daily? Is this time of day too overwhelming?
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Can you observe your own tone of voice? Is it peaked? Are you continually repeating statements? “Use your fork. Sit down.”
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Do you think you can challenge yourself to NOT make any comments at all? (Man, is that ever a challenge)
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Let the meal be child directed, and focus on just being together
Now what about rocky transitional periods? We’ve ALL got those struggles! Transition times like heading out the door and running errands, or getting ready for bedtime.
-Presence over education. Can you move through the motion with less words? Just the actions. Instead of “We are going to be late, hurry up” can you just place the shoes in front of the child, keep your body language upbeat, and stay at eye level
-Connection over correction. Calm presence over expectations. Make the agenda less obvious if your child has a sensitive nature, or difficulty transitioning
-Breathing together, having a still moment in the body to reconnect. “What sounds do you hear?”
-Avoid labels
-Build in a “cool down” period before transitioning. Can you recognize your own rigidity, and see what you are projecting
-Ask a question versus telling. “Will you be ready in 10 minutes?” Versus “You better have this cleaned up, we have to go in 10 minutes!”
Listen in to this AWESOME episode for tips on transition and silly behavior! 😊
Resources and links
- Do you want to do an on air coaching call? It’s free and you can apply today. Fill out this short application.
- Work with Anna.
- Read How To Make Family Meals More Mindful article on Forbes Magazine that features advice from Anna Seewald.
Other episodes you may enjoy:
- {Coaching}Tips to Ease Parental Anxiety and Set Boundaries
- {Coaching} 5 Stress-Free Ways To Motivate Kids To Clean Up After Themselves
- {Coaching} 3 Powerful Solutions to Managing Difficult Misbehavior
- {Coaching} Developing Body Awareness
- Disagreeing on Discipline? How You Can You Find a Middle Ground in Parenting
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With gratitude,
Anna
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